In 1997, Pamela Redmond Satran wrote a list for Glamour Magazine. Having already passed her thirtieth birthday,her goal was to tell younger women about “the things I really wished I’d had and known by that important milestone.” It not only resonated, it became a phenomenon. To this day,the now bestselling author’s list continues to make its way across the web, via sites, inboxes, and social feeds, experiencing recurring surges of viral popularity. Yet, up until very recently, in typical not-giving-credit-where-credit-is-due internet form, it was most often shared with either no attribution to Pamela or tagged as someone else’s work, including “Maya Angelou’s Best Poem Ever.”
Here are 15 interesting points from that list …
1)”A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
enough money within her control to move out
and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to…
……..
2)A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..
a youth she’s content to leave behind….
3)A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
a past juicy enough that she’s looking forward to
retelling it in her old age….
………..
4)A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ….
one friend who always makes her laugh… and one who lets her cry…
………..
5)A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
a feeling of control over her destiny…
6)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
how to fall in love without losing herself..
7)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
how to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without; ruining the friendship…
8)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
when to try harder… and WHEN TO WALK AWAY…
9)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
that she can’t change the length of her calves,
the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents..
10)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
that her childhood may not have been perfect..but its over…
11)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
what she would and wouldn’t do for love or more…
12)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
how to live alone… even if she doesn’t like it…
13)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.. .
whom she can trust,
whom she can’t,
and why she shouldn’t take it personally…
14)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
where to go…
be it to her best friend’s kitchen table…
or a charming inn in the woods…
when her soul needs soothing…
15)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
what she can and can’t accomplish in a day…
a month…and a year…
So much for the creativity passed on without credit.
And here is a dedication to Every Woman out there…Enjoy 💖👍💖
An interesting article for those who believe that all we see is all that exists.
It stimulates our lateral thinking :
To something that is beyond!!
This lovely parable is from “Your Sacred Self” by Dr. Wayne Dyer.
In a mother’s womb were two babies. One asked the other: “Do you believe in life after delivery?”The other replied, “Why, of course. There has to be something after delivery. Maybe we are here to prepare ourselves for what we will be later.”
“Nonsense” said the first. “There is no life after delivery. What kind of life would that be?”
The second said, “I don’t know, but there will be more light than here. Maybe we will walk with our legs and eat from our mouths. Maybe we will have other senses that we can’t understand now.”
The first replied, “That is absurd. Walking is impossible. And eating with our mouths? Ridiculous! The umbilical cord supplies nutrition and everything we need. But the umbilical cord is so short. Life after delivery is to be logically excluded.”
The second insisted, “Well I think there is something and maybe it’s different than it is here. Maybe we won’t need this physical cord anymore.”
The first replied, “Nonsense. And moreover if there is life, then why has no one ever come back from there? Delivery is the end of life, and in the after-delivery there is nothing but darkness and silence and oblivion. It takes us nowhere.”
“Well, I don’t know,” said the second, “but certainly we will meet Mother and she will take care of us.”
The first replied “Mother? You actually believe in Mother? That’s laughable. If Mother exists then where is She now?”
The second said, “She is all around us. We are surrounded by her. We are of Her. It is in Her that we live. Without Her this world would not and could not exist.”
Said the first: “Well I don’t see Her, so it is only logical that She doesn’t exist.”
To which the second replied, “Sometimes, when you’re in silence and you focus and listen, you can perceive Her presence, and you can hear Her loving voice, calling down from above.”
*May be this is one of the best explanations to the concept of ‘GOD/Source’!*
An interesting read on the value of positive words as reminders.
*Your password can change your life….. lovely read*
How a Password Changed a Life…….
I was having an average morning until I sat down in front of my office computer .
“your password has expired”, a server message flashed on my screen, with instructions for changing it…
In my company we have to change passwords monthly..
I was deeply depressed after my recent divorce. Disbelief over what she had done to me was what I thought all day long ….
I remembered a tip I’d heard from my former boss. He’d said, “I’m going to use a password that is going to change my life”.
I couldn’t focus on getting things done in my current mood.. My password reminded me that I shouldn’t let myself be a victim of my recent breakup and that I was strong enough to do something about it.
I made my password – Forgive@her. I had to type this password several times every day, each time my computer would lock. Each time I came back from lunch I wrote forgive her.
The simple action changed the way I looked at my ex-wife.. That constant reminder of reconciliation led me to accept the way things happened and helped me deal with my depression..
By the time the server prompted me to change my password following month, I felt free.
The next time I had to change my password I thought about the next thing that I had to get done. My password became Quit@smoking4ever .
It motivated me to follow my goal and I was able to quit smoking.
One month later, my password became Save4trip@europe, and in three months I was able to visit Europe.
Reminders helped me materialize my goals and kept me motivated and excited, it’s sometimes difficult to come up with your next goal
Keeping at it brings great results.
After a few months my password was –
lifeis#beautiful !!! Life going to change again…
*Moral of the Story is Your Internal Talk Matters, what you tell yourself conditions you to think in that direction and you are able to witness realtime RESULTS.*
Reading this made me think more on the power of words.
There is immense power in positive affirmation.
As much as in manifestations through sincere intention.
Daily repetitions of chantings in prayer
And grace in words of gratitude.
So much for self suggestions towards well being.
The words we think ,read, speak or write all have immense power to change our ways.
This Now’ is a just a flicker
In the vast endless space.
A fleeting moment,
That travels backwards in Time.
Never to return on its one-way path.
Never blink your eyes, lest you miss
The beauty of the Moment.
Some moments well captured in this time frame.
Stays afresh like the etching on a rock.
A single moment, so potent
To change the course of your life.
A bliss or curse depends on the Awakening Awareness of its Transcience.
Seek an understanding mind
Make no effort to stagnate,
As flowing is its innate Nature.
Senses wandering free
Unmindful of the other
Thoughts floating like clouds
Unconnected actions of body n mind
Aimless moments, effortless wastage
Unaware of the flow of Time.
Like sand seeping through the fingers
‘This Now’ dissolving in the past,
Creating a formless future, at what cost?
Potent moments become futile.
Detachment is different from disconnection.
Awareness is not aligned to alienation.
Make an effort to be consciously present
Not to miss a moment of breath,
‘Be in the Now’ to witness the magic of Life.
Anjana
Sharing my mothers reflections here on the value of the moments. She wrote this after reflecting on my earlier poem
Dance is a lot like life . Here I bring forth a few simple pointers on Partner Dancing.
Important lessons in leadership are easily learned, on the dance floor…as you lead and as you follow.
They are very simple lessons and yet very powerful and contribute in making one a better dancer immediately. But more importantly it helps to know how to be a better leader in life too.
About two decades or more, Social dancing workshops and lessons in India were rarely common. We decided to do something about it and the Dance Concepts Latin &ballroom dance workshops began . We started with the basics :a Foxtrot , a Waltz , Jive , Rock n Roll and of course a Cha Cha Cha.
The idea was to teach as naturally and as simply as possible, so that the students made quick progress in learning the concepts of dancing rather than just a routine. Having had the privilege of sharing our social dancing skills with so many eager learners over the years we made a few observations … when the learners were learning the footwork side by side they would find it a breeze. But when we instructed them to join hands and dance together in an open hold some of them felt as if they were wrestling more than dancing with the lady pulling one way, while the man was pushing her another way Each had their ideas about how they should move and how it would look.
Social Dancing is a partnership, a partnership where there is a leader and a follower. Even if you don’t like to follow, to dance well together it is wise to respect the partnership rules. Learning to follow is a skill that one needs to develop and is not necessarily easy. It’s difficult as you have to do the same thing your partner is doing, except backward.
Just as important, you have to follow his lead even if it seems as if he’s going the wrong way. And thus if one learns to lead well, the partner may actually enjoy the feeling of being led than feeling yanked and shoved around.
Traditionally the man takes the lead on the dance floor. Yes, in ballroom dancing – even in these days -mostly the man leads. But roles can be and are reversed as well. After all it takes two to tango… if one leads the other follows.
Being a leader is more about sensitivity and definitely not about pushing your partner around, but to lead well, it is necessary to develop spatial awareness so you know exactly where your partner is at every moment, which foot their weight is balanced on without looking. You have to be aware of their pacing, and be mindful of the strengths, and weaknesses. And you have to take all that into consideration every time you move with a partner in your arms.
A good leader connects than controls.
Savvy
Sense what you are going to do before you do it. Just be aware of what your next step is going to be, and give your partner the signal at the right time so they can follow you gracefully. Like so in life: Having some foresight of what your life should become is like knowing what type of dance you want to do. But being a good leader requires more of you than that. It demands that you also have good ideas about the medium- and short-term tasks that are required to achieve that vision. And it means you have to communicate those ideas to your partners – those who are working closely with you to achieve your vision.
When dancing together it is very important to …
Signal your intentions with clarity. To lead well, and the way to avoid using force is to give strong, clear signals. The clearer your signals are, the easier it is to follow you. And the easier it is for your partner to follow you, the better you will look and feel together and the better they will like dancing with you.
In life: knowing what you want from your partners, colleagues etc is not enough. You have to let them know what you want them to do by communicating it to them with clarity. And most of all you have to develop the art of patience.
Lead to demonstrate your partner’s strengths.In dancing, the purpose of the leader is to lead – but the purpose of the dance itself is to enjoy the moment with your partner, each focusing on the bringing the best of each others strengths than the weaknesses…
Wise leaders hardly blame the follower when things go haphazard , which it might at times! After all exhilaration and excitement are a stones throw away from comfort zones that one might trespass at times , yet when ever the leader and the follower work in harmony … it is magnetic and mesmerizing indeed! It is then a dance beyond all expectations!
In your growing years, many emotional fluctuations of belief and disbelief will arise from curiosity to concern, from doubt to belief, questioning the purpose of our existence, questioning the powers undefined , the supremeness of it all ..!!!!
May my thoughts be well scrutinized by you in your quest to answers that resonate to your being . But hope to pass on a share of my simple understanding of the complexities of the undefinable ‘Faith’ in the name of God!
To me faith is the hope and strength of divinity in each of us …Without which we cease to exist as living beings .
Acknowledging the presence of divine compassion in our lives is about being able to receive as much easily as much as being able to give.
When we are focused on evolving deeper into our spiritual path of awareness , very often the body is neglected … it could be physically neglected, abused, deprived in more ways than one ,either out of sheer ignorance or due to assumption that austerity and overt practices of discipline over our body will only lead to salvation .
When the very dwelling place of our being is neglected how are the roots going to dig deeper… wisdom is not intellectual understanding alone.
True wisdom is acknowledgement of the divinity in every living being … being able to understand the union of the heart and the mind , and in the awakening of the wisdom one finds the balance in the union of action and thoughts.
Caring for our body,is a prerequisite to spiritual growth .. if you don’t love yourself, how can you love others .Eastern philosophies extoll the virtues of equanimity and the consciousness of the intuitive intellect, a sense intelligence than just rational thoughts … And when we learn that you and I are simply one… the connectedness of consciousness becomes easy to unravel . We are also able see and to accept the reality of the shades of grey in between the black and white of human behavior .
When we are able to do so , the so called negative traits of reaction , rebuttal to an action converts itself to a mindful response with equanimity .
This method invokes a sense of balance in the living being .
Simply adding an element of gratitude to all that we are blessed with will only let us ingrain a spirit of gratefulness in whatever we do …as we learn to respect and love another being as part of the same source … AND THAT TO ME IS ….
BEING HAPPY WHERE YOU ARE, AS YOU ARE, WITH ALL THAT YOU ARE …. LOVING THE SELF …AND CARING ENOUGH TO LOVE THE WORLD AROUND YOU !
AND THEN THE FAITH IN THE GOD -NESS IN YOU AND ME IS ONE !
Love
Mom
Savvy
This is an excerpt from a few reflections written to my daughter in her growing years.
All is in a days work ?
I wonder if the world could see
The simplest truth of life and work.
Work has its place in life But it must not takeover life
Treat work well meet and greet
On its terms but dont get bound by it.
The canvas of life is expansive
And yet inclusive
And work is not all.
Many facets of life bring on the shine
Each facet carrying its purpose of being.
An experience of each begets the wisdom
Make time for it all.
Work is work only if work is treated like work.
Dont abuse it. dont disregard .
Treat it with dignity own up to it
Value it as an opportunity .
Give it your best shot
Take nothing for granted
For every bit matters.
Respect work as it t comes as it is tough to live without work
Life is life only if you care to live it well
What use is life if you are not even able to
Live it
All you have is one life.
Heartbeats in every now
Every moment matters for its your life
To do all that you truly can
Every day is fresh with all the possibilities
Make life work for yourself
As you gear up to step up to life
Life will open up the path for you.
Your body is a temple, but only if you treat it as one.” ~Astrid Alauda
The thoughts we think…
The nature of our thoughts, our choices of food intake and nutrition for sustenance, our associations and our activities and our rest patterns are all interconnected in the conversion of energy to conscious awareness.
The mind and body connection is prevalent and the signs of repeating patterns of stress show significantly on our bodies in time
Alteration is a process of transformation that can be gradual, tiring and taxing to lead and follow. For example to rid the body of a chronic condition the behavioural patterns that created it in the first place are rooted in the system and hence to nudge a root one needs to work the underlying layers of emotions that associate and accumulate and elevate the conditions of its existence and growth.
The cleansing process is then definitely natural and non-invasive. A supportive and strength giving initiative would be ideal as alternatives to follow.
Alternative natural cures are best environments to work towards in treatment and eradication of root cause than just attacking the symptoms.
The part can never be well unless the whole is well.” ~Plato
The wisdom is in our observation of our own pattern of being as we are, as we behave and feel.
The thought reflections getting imprinted on the body and our ability to intervene are both significant. So to significantly alter the nature of our existence we need to be present in the now.
A few thoughts…
Thoughts come and go but the choice of what to steer it towards rests with us.
Our positive orientated thoughts are our bridge to transform ourselves for the better.
They are available to link ourselves and connect with our deepest truth.
Every interlink in positivity is a step towards personal transformation as much as the power of spreading expansive goodwill and wellness into nature.
Wisdom speaketh not always in words It sends forth a knowing of its presence At times elusive like the spirit of the being, blowing in the wind. At other like a soul in the living, sensing, emoting in the feeling.
And in such a knowing Understand the bliss In the moments Acknowledge the grace In the blessing.
Sense its presence Allow it to communicate Honour its effects Respond with all your being.
For wisdom is a deliverance That comes from the truth in the being Of life, loved and lived Giving eternal hope to the living.
Savvy Raj 
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