Savvy Raj

Live Life Lovingly!


10 Comments

Care or control?

Care or Control?

I was in consultation with a middle age couple.

They started fighting right in front of me.

The upset husband said-

See doc….

I ‘Care’ so much for her & this is what I get in return.

To which the fuming wife replied-

He doesn’t care…
he just ‘Controls’!

The care from one person was perceived as control by another!

This made me think…🤔

What is Care and
What is Control?

How to identify them?

Soon

I received the answer.

I had an argument with my teenage daughter over a trivial disciplinery issue…

Harsh words were exchanged leaving both of us in tears…😪

After sometime,

as our emotions settled down ,

We said sorry to each other…

My daughter hugged me and said-

Papa ,

You know why you got upset?

You were not upset because I did wrong.

but u were upset because

I didnt follow your instructions…

there is a big difference!

I was stunned with her mature thinking pattern.

I received my answer too…

I was trying to Control her under the disguise of Care…

that caused the conflict ….

If I really ‘Care’ for someone ,

I will not get upset or angry with that person…

I will keep searching different ways to help him…

If I am struggling in any relationship…

I need to closely observe

If there is any subtle Control hidden behind my apparent Care…_*

‘because

“Care is an expression of love

While Control is an expression of ego…

Control cuts…Care connects

Control hurts…Care heals.

Keep Caring for people

but dont Control them …

because

Often people are not wrong…

they are just ‘different’.

Keep Caring.


5 Comments

Being as you are…

Your life is a gift.

Explore the best in you

Take charge of yourself!

Choose to know your strengths.

Than search for influencers outside

Choose authenticity, to be real

There is much within awaiting you

So much to simply be…

It is actually simpler to be yourself. There is something that each of us can do better than any other. So important then to listen to the inner voice and bravely obey that.

Savvy


10 Comments

Honour and Respect

A Matter of Honouring the Self and Respecting Others.

“Nothing in Nature can be fully free without restricions or interdependence. Such is the way of Nature, like so is its creations. There can be free will for all, but care should be taken in its extension so it never suffocates others. All natural elements like Sun, Ocean confine to their own boundaries, in spite of being so potent and powerful. If they cross calamities can happen.”

I received these above reflections from my mother on reading my recent post On Freedom

This is an important aspect of freedom which is about respect for edges and spaces. Knowing your edges… is knowing your freedom ends at the tip of your fingers and toes. So honour your personal space… Beyond that there are boundaries to be respected.

On respecting another’s personal space

The term “personal space” generally refers to the physical distance between two people in a social, family, or work environment. Think of your personal space as the air between your body and an invisible shield, or bubble, you have formed around yourself for any relationship.

Respect for personal space is an important life skill .
Although there are different norms in different cultures across the world . Any invasion of personal space is considered a threat to the freedom of the individual all over the world.

Dancing and Personal Space.

Speaking of partner dancing… in certain dances there are rules for a professional distance to be maintained between dancers so that they wont get in each others way, which technically makes perfect sense.

But rules are often broken and unfortunately that is also the reason where you feel uncomfortable dancing with some people over others.
The best connection amongst dancers are in those that respect the partnership and maintain the personal space in between as it helps them manuvere moves with ease.
Yet in life we often see people blatantly trampling on each others personal spaces.
Not only is it too close for comfort it is also an invasion of privacy and threatening in nature.

A few tips on respecting personal spaces.

Every person has different standards of physical and social contact . Some people run the risk of offending others as they have a pesky habit of touching or tapping people as they converse … it truly can be very irritating and in many cultures around the world it is considered rude and ill mannered. It is wise to avoid touching anyone you don’t know.

Always enter a room or office by knocking first. Respect anothers privacy as much as you would like another to respect your own.

Acknowledge others personal space on the road or in public spaces.While travelling make sure to keep your edges with you. Avoid flaying and flinging arms too much as you walk for it can get in anothers way.

It is rude to fling your arm around someone’s shoulder or slap anyone on the back unless you know the person very well. Overt display of affection can be irritating as not everyone is comfortable with the physical touch.

It is good to understand every parent looks at parenting differently. Some think their infants can contract germs if touched by strangers. So avoid cuddling or fondling others children.

It is also important to speak to and show children how to protect their boundaries and respect the personal space of others.

Be close enough to hear and speak without whispering or shouting.While standing stay at least 4 feet away from a person unless you know him or her well. Avoiding treading on someone’s pathway.

At times invariably people get too close for comfort . Take note of cues.When someone leans away from you, you are probably in that person’s space that makes him or her uncomfortable. Take a step back.

If you walk into a cinema or theater that isn’t crowded, leave an extra seat between you and the next person. However, it is alright to sit next to someone if the room is crowded.

Often in situations of extreme eagerness to communicate with another boundaries are crossed. Avoid leaning over someone else’s shoulder to read something unless invited. It is probably done in a harmless way Yet it almost amounts to taking another for granted.

It is truly bad manners to go through anyone else’s personal belongings. Never do so! And never encourage such kind of behaviour in children or adults.
Many years ago I remember an incident where one of our family friend’s young daughter had picked up a habit of checking out handbags of their guests in front of them even as they were all together sitting, engaged in a conversation. Often it is necesssary for parents to stop their children right then and there instead of encouraging it by saying my child is simply curious and loves to play with new bags . It was a difficult situation to handle as no one would like it if someone went through their handbags even if it was a child.

Check if you can take your pets along while visiting friends houses. While you may see no reason to… it is prudent to do so as…your pets are pets only for you! It is necessary to remember not everyone is a pet owner and all do not feel likewise or can tolerate every thinģ in the name of pets.
Your pet and its care is truly your own buisness.

It is wrong to cut in front of people in line.Patience is a great virtue. Respect queues. Respect system. Respect space.

Savvy


8 Comments

Reach out…

Stretch your self…

to reach out…

a little more everyday 🙂

Some day you will be thankful

How far you have reached!

Every moment is an opportunity

To reach out and grow

Evolve for the better

Be open to the unfolding life

Strech yourself a little more every day…

To accommodate

To acknowledge

To accept

You will find your strength

In flexibility

In adaptability

In your vulnerability

You will find new frontiers

That you paved along the way.

Trust yourself a little more

There is so much out there

If you are willing to see and learn

Reach out & truly care to share

The simple joys of being alive.

Savvy


9 Comments

On Self esteem

Self Esteem is deeply entwined with our inner confidence and the way we choose to behave in this world.

Unfortunately it is also influenced by many external factors which could be peers , family , relationships , and even state of health at the moment.

People who have a strong foundation of self esteem will tend to see the value of a life well lived.

If your feeling undermined by someone who brings you down at every opportunity, who sabotages your growth by clever manipulation you can rest assured they are not on your side. In fact they are the ones saddled with insecurities and self esteem issues and the sooner you distance yourself from such people , the better you are going to be.

No person is your friend who demands your silence, or denies your right to grow. Alice Walker

A few surefire ways to develop your sense of Self Esteem.

1 : Unlearn the negative patterns of thought.

2 : Create a habit of speaking mindfully

3: Choose to believe in your self worth.

4: Choose to forgive and let go baggage.

5: Keep learning & updating your skills.

Most importantly, celebrating the little things in your life makes you realise your self worth… so be a friend to yourself. It truly matters a great deal!

You owe it to yourself …cos you are worth it.

Savvy


8 Comments

Light after the night.

After deep pain arrives a great blessing
After heavy rain appears the rainbow

In toughest moments arrives a breakthrough
Through the biggest wave shines through a light.

The longest night awakens with the hope of new dawn.
The longest tunnel opens to beams of sunlight

In deepest silence may be hidden utmost reverence.
In deepest gratitude lies a heartfelt prayer

What is visible may be an illusion
What is invisible may be the truth!

Savvy

#hopegiving #trust #faith #belief


11 Comments

Life and Living

Life is in the living.

Sharing a beautiful message from this incident.

Nearby, a building construction work was going on.

Lots of poor labourers were working there and their small children used to hold on to one another’s shirt and play “train-train”.

Someone would become the engine and others would become bogies.

Every day, these children used to take turns becoming the engine and bogies.

But, there was one small boy wearing only a half pant who used to hold one small green *cloth* in his hand and become the guard daily.

So, once I went to him and asked him ..”son, don’t u also wish to become an engine or a bogie some time?”

He softly replied, “Sir , I don’t have a shirt to wear so how will the other children catch me to make the train?

I could see the slight wetness in his eyes.

But, it gave me a lesson…. he could have cried and sat at home and abused his parents for not affording to buy him a shirt.

But instead, he chose another way to play and enjoy himself..

In life, we don’t get all things we desire and we keep complaining ..

I dont have a bike, I don’t have car , I don’t have this or that etc…

Life is like that ….we need to make it beautiful and be grateful for what we have ..🙏🏼

*HAVE AN ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE*

Life is in the way we see it!

Savvy


7 Comments

On Dancing…

To dance is to be able to glide as if you are as light as the air and soar in grace, as you feel the wind enveloping yet beckoning you to scale new heights of harmonious effusion’.

Savvy


9 Comments

Silence Speaks

What is Silence?

Silence is poetry in unspoken prose

Silence is a dance in stillness to soundless music.

Silence is a hush beyond the din.

Silence is a projection of inner bliss.

Silence is a prayer in its loudest form

Silence leads and the path appears.

Trust the lessons learned in silence.

Savvy


8 Comments

Partners

Partners

Living loving
Striving,thriving
Partners in life

Partners in a dance
Swinging swaying
Falling and rising

Blurring the lines
Reflecting the truth
Between life and art

Savvy


6 Comments

Just a dance every day!

An old student from years ago, and a doctor by profession sent this forward below on the benefits of dance today, saying he saw this and remembered me. I was truly touched.🙂

Yes my years spent teaching dancing have been truly rewarding and continues to enrich creatively in every moment .

I remembered writing and conducting workshops on this very subject of dance application and health enrichments many years ago and had called it’ Just a dance every day’!

Glad to share it here with great joy… And I thank my student & dear Doctor friend for remembering me after all these years.

Dancing has the ability to change the inner you for the better with external movements. MRI Scans shows that the same neurons are fired when you watch some one else dance , as it would if you are dancing yourself .

Dancing also fosters empathy, elevates mood and has the power to spread smiles….making people experience emotions which they may have never felt possible too.

In a study conducted in Italy on cardiac patients who took waltz classes not only did they develop healthier arteries,and reducing of blockages , but also reported to be in much better spirit than those who took exercise classes like cycling and treadmill..

The expressive aspect of dance releases pent up emotion and is godsend for those who find it difficult to communicate verbally.

As actions at times speaks louder than words dancers can simply bring out what they want to say in the movements.Thus dancing restores the equilibrium of the mind and body .

Dancing with a partner makes you think beyond yourself and empathise with another. Everyday if you are able to get some time to dance a bit, its a beautiful holistic way that helps in paving the way to a happy healthy, healing harmonious you.

Savvy Raj

www.danceconcepts.in


12 Comments

On Freedom

Are you truly free?

Free enough to be

You as you truly are?

Being free is a birth right.

Be free of bondages that restrict.

Unleash and unshackle yourself;

You owe it most to your own self.

Let go of the unwanted burdens.

Let go of fear and favour.

Let go of notions and assumptions.

Create spaces in your thoughts

To meet the lightness of your being.

Take yourself lightly

As density can pull you down.

Know you are meant to be all

That you truly are!

Nothing can bound your soul from expression

For true freedom is respect for self and others.

Be free to find yourself.

Be free to think for yourself.

Know the world needs your uniqueness as you are…now more than ever before!

A few more thoughts:

What is your idea of freedom?

How important is freedom and being free to you as a person?

If you could trade freedom for something else, would you?

And with what?

Savvy


11 Comments

On Mindfulness

Mindfulness is always a work in progress… It is a continuous journey in awareness, not just a destination.
It is a cultivation of appreciation for life and living in every moment…

  • To meet & see things as they are
  • To have an awareness of the self and another.
  • To integrate the mind and body
  • To know all is deeply connected
  • To acknowledge the arising perspectives as part of the flow.
  • To value the spaces between the steps
  • To respond than react.
  • To create a habit to be in a witness mode.
  • To have patience in waiting.
  • To sense the awareness of the oneness.

  • To feel safe and supported
  • To develop space to be content and connected.
  • To be glad for no particular reason.
  • To live with awareness than simply exist in the moment.

Savvy

#morningmusings #thoughts #nowmatters # worklifebalance


6 Comments

Trust to let go!

When you dance with another, what matters most is the trust you place in yourself and your partner to dance as one unit, moving in synchrony and feeling the harmony of your beating hearts. This is the ideal connection that makes dance come alive in the moment.

Yet as much as trust is a much-needed trait in dancing as a couple, often trust takes time to build and is subjective amongst dancers.

To trust is to let go of doubt.

To trust is to allow space for growth.

To trust is to know patience in waiting.

To trust is to allow space for faith.

To trust another is not easy

For one and all.

To some, it may be very difficult.

But trust is certainly worth trying.

To trust takes effort, not assumptions.

It takes practice in time and space.

For trust can be on many levels

Emotional, mental, or physical.

Trust is built to evolve along

For in building the relationship

The foundation needs to endure

The winds of change.

Trust what trust does.

Try to pin it down.

Watch how it turns out to be

Confusing and elusive…

Before you trust, you will

Spend time sensing,

And witnessing the energy,

The tension in the transactions

Being ready for changes,

Being prepared to brave

Through disappointments and dissatisfactions

That may arise at any moment.

And yet…

Trust is not only about building

But about the ability to let go

Of worry and insecurities,

Fear and failures.

To trust is to reach out

Without any expectations

But in utter faith and belief

That you will be supported!

A dance between a couple is a blissful feeling only when there is trust in both the self and the other, just as much as the passion, as only when there is the letting go, can there be the flow manifesting itself through the movements.
Savvy Raj

Member International Dance Council

UNESCO

http://www.danceconcepts.in


19 Comments

Knocks of wisdom

When wisdom knocks it is never easy…
When wisdom knocks know its just the beginning
When wisdom knocks be ready to be challenged
When wisdom knocks know you are learning
When wisdom knocks know you are meant to learn
When wisdom knocks be open to understand
When wisdom knocks it opens many doors

When wisdom knocks know be ready to experience the now
When wisdom knocks be ready to dare
When wisdom knocks be ready to acknowledge
When wisdom knocks be ready to respect
When wisdom knocks be ready to witness
When wisdom knocks be ready to accept
When wisdom knocks be ready to gain
When wisdom knocks be ready to let go
When wisdom knocks know the value of balance

When wisdom knocks know your own equanimity
When wisdom knocks be ready to know your self
When wisdom knocks know there is something beyond your self
When wisdom knocks be aware of the greater purpose
When wisdom knocks become willing to understand beyond…

When wisdom knocks know it seeks you
When wisdom knocks know there is always a reason
When wisdom knocks trust yourself
When wisdom knocks keep the faith
When wisdom knocks know you are in the path of awakening.

When wisdom knocks be ready to accept responsibility
When wisdom knocks know you are strengthened in spirit and soul.
When wisdom knocks know you are on your path.
When wisdom knocks know you are blessed
When wisdom knocks know you are enough for you!.

There are many knocks of wisdom…
Each unique in its potential lesson
To learn to see the now in every moment
Every knock of wisdom leaves imprints in the spirit of the soul.
Are you ready?
Savvy