When you are in a position of influence especially as a coach, a trainer you are responsible to aid the development and building up of life. From the life coaching perspective there are many humane standards that help reach the set goals.
As a coach, respect and inclusion are significant for the success of your coaching. It is important to show ‘Respect’ not only for individual or team you are coaching by being unbiased and empathic of their abilities, but also for your time and effort as well as respect for the reason and need for coaching .
As for inclusiveness, without it you cannot build rapport as a coach. Inclusion is also about being attentive and open minded of diverse perspectives and opinions.
Over the decades, coaching individuals and groups as a Dance Educator & Trainer,and a Life Coach, I have had varied experiences of how being inclusive, empathic, open minded to listen and understand, sharing mutual respect has made a positive impact on the coaching process.
Both respect and inclusion can make a meaningful and lasting difference in the lives of those you coach.
Like a new dawn, Trust new beginnings, Renew hope, renew effort Making it a day Full of positivity & possibilities. Step forward With grit & gratitude Each moment is special Miracles happen in any moment.
DISCLAIMER: CERTAIN FACTS HERE MAY BE INACCURATE BUT THE ESSENCE OF THE PIECE IS STILL VERY MEANINGFUL ABOUT VALUING PARTNERS.
Saeed Jeffrey divorced Madhur Jaffrey for his second wife Jennifer. But this veteran actor has won the hearts with his heart-wrenching regret.
This came out, a few years after he left this world. 30-Jul-2019
From the diary of Sayed Jaffrey, the famous bollywood character actor:
I was 19 when I was married to Mehrunima who was 17. As I grew up, I was very fascinated by the british culture in colonial India. I learnt to speak English fluently, wear suits with grace, and developed impeccable etiquettes. But Mehrunima grew up to be my complete opposite – homely, a typical housewife. All my advices and admonishments couldn’t change her basic personality – an obedient wife, a doting mother and a good homemaker.
But she was not what I wanted. More I tried to change her, more we drifted apart. Gradually she metamorphosed from a cheerful affectionate young girl into a quiet insecure woman. Meanwhile I started getting attracted to a co-actor of mine who was all what I wanted in my wife.
After 10 years of marriage, l divorced Mehrunima, left my home and married my co- actor. I had ensured financial security of Mehrunima and my kids . For about 6-7 months everything went well. Then I started realising, my new wife was not caring and affectionate. She was only concerned about her beauty, her ambitions, her wants and desires. Sometimes I missed Mehrunima’s caring touch and concern for my welfare.
Life moved on . I and my new wife were 2 persons living in a house, not one soul living in a home. I never went back to find out what happened to Mehrunima and my kids. After about 6 -7 years of my second marriage, I came across an article on a Madhur Jaffrey, an upcoming famous chef who had recently launched a book of her own recipes. The moment I looked at the picture of the smart elegant lady, I was stunned. It was Mehrunima. But how could it be ??? She had remarried and changed her maiden name too.
I was shooting abroad at that time. She lived in US now. I caught the next flight to US. I inquired about her where abouts and went to meet her. She refused to see me. My daughter who was 14, and son who was 12, told her they wanted to talk to me one last time. Her new husband was by her side. He was also my children’s legal father now. To this date, I cannot forget what my children told me.
They told me that their new father knows the meaning of true love. He Broke Da Cage of Negativity. He accepted Mehrunima as she was and never tried to change her into what he himself was, because he loves her more than he loves himself. He let her evolve at her own pace and never tried to force his wishes on her. He accepted and enjoyed her person as it was. And she has bloomed into a confident loving affectionate self reliant lady today under her second husband’s selfless love and acceptance.
Where as I was full of selfishness, demands and unacceptance of her persona had crushed her and then in my selfishness had discarded her. Creating a Cage of Negativity.
The Greatest learning of my life-
You don’t change people you love, you love them as they are….
At Techno Pacific University, a speaker asked a woman among the audience:
“Does your husband keep you happy?”
The husband, sitting nearby, straightened up confidently. The reason was, his wife had never complained about him. He was happy.
However, the wife clearly said, “No, my husband doesn’t keep me happy.”
The husband was shocked, but the wife continued:
“My husband hasn’t kept me happy. He hasn’t made me happy. But I am happy. My happiness doesn’t depend on him. It’s up to me. Whether I am happy is a matter concerning myself.”
“Being happy at every stage of life is my decision. If I depend on others for my happiness, or on certain things, or certain moments, it means I am in big trouble.”
“Everything around us keeps changing. People, wealth, my body, temperature, my boss, pleasures, friends, my physical and mental health, all of it. It’s a long list.”
“No matter what happens, being happy is my decision. Whether I have a lot or a little, my happiness doesn’t diminish. Whether I go out or stay at home, whether I am poor or rich, my happiness doesn’t diminish.”
“I was happy before marriage, and I remain happy after. I am happy about myself because I am happy with myself.”
“I love my life not because it is easier than others’ lives, but because I have decided to be personally happy. I am responsible for my happiness.”
“When I hold this as a decision in my mind, I remove the burden from others to make me happy. This makes everyone’s life easier. That is why my life has been happy for so many years.”
The applause didn’t stop.
Don’t assign the responsibility of keeping you happy to others.
Whether it’s sunny or rainy, you are unwell, poor, injured, or unloved, do not give up the happiness within your mind.
As long as you respect yourself wholeheartedly, you will find happiness within yourself.
All matter is energy And we are unique speckles of vibrations. All resonating in the universality of life and living. Trust you matter, more than you know Believe you can and are making a difference As you connect deeply in the universal flow Tune in to reflect the truth of your being.
Every word every deed Every step every move Impacts the larger whole Just as much as the world around you. So start with who and what is around you Sense your intuitive self talking to you Telling much in all its subtlety. Trust it, for it is abound With the strength of the subtle energies. Resonate joy, abundance, balance Resonate love ,harmony and peace For you have the power to transform your world.
As a Freelancer or a Self Employed Individual inspite of the independence and freedom to manage what you choose to do, there are often many challenges that test you on your journey.
Here are a few mindful ways to destress through your challenges using reflection for your personal growth.
Breath: Start the day by find time for your health. You can simply start by observing your breath. Witness it, moving in and out of the body. Sense your own breath. Check the speed and patterns in your breath. Are you breathing fast or slow? Are you able to hear the sounds of your breath? Our breathing sends many signals to us about our health, if we only care to observe.
Meditation. Reflect on your life as you go into a deeper state of being.You can choose your kind of meditation from the many practices of meditation options. Be it breath awareness through deep breathing, or mindful walking meditation or sound meditation. Be fully present in the Now.
Movement : Reflect on the positive ways you can use your body to reset and recharge your self. Choose to take a mindful and conscious walk. Sense everything in and around as you move with self awareness Reflect on your day and observe your thoughts. Many thoughts will vye for your attention. Let them come and go as you witness their unfolding. You will find much inspiration as you go. You will note your state of mind. You will have clarity of your emotional and mental health. You will sense the truths of your life.
Journalling.: Writing your thoughts is a good reflection tool that helps process and synthesise new information and life experiences. In fact it increases creative thinking and problem solving. As you reflect on your reactions and responses you will find greater clarity on your path.
Reading : A beautiful practice for any time that you can be inspired is by inculcating a habit of reading regularly. Choose a good book take time to read. You will find yourself charged with many inspirations to kickstart your day. It can be a contemplative practice for some deep thinking and self introspection and improvement.
Feedback : An opinion of another about you is their assimilated perception that they may voice out to you with or without your asking. Seeking honest feedback from trusted sources can help you course correct yourself. It is how you take the feedbacks you receive and what and how you focus on it that makes all the difference. Be aware that feedback is a valuable tool for self reflection and personal growth.
There are many tools for reflection like the above. However even acknowledging ones feelings and emotions helps in understanding more and managing stressful situations better.
Reflection practices can be inclusive and expansive. Besides silent contemplation and introspection while learning from mistakes, participating in a conversation, be it Group discussions, workshops can be an engaging practice for Self awareness.. They are also opportunities for self growth.
Are you listening to your body and what it is telling you?
Do you find time to invest in yourself?
Are you on your priority list?
Do you have a habit of putting others happiness and health ahead of yours?
Do you accommodate for everything and are perhaps less assertive and over tolerant?
The truth is you can never give from an empty vessel. Creating a beautiful life that you love is as important as for others. If there are gaps in your vessel of life,what will you share from?
Creating your own well-being in life is a responsiblity to yourself.
Ultimately it’s all about finding time to find yourself your way!
Your emotions are your friends. Sometimes you find them at war with each other. They need your understanding. They are your supportive vents of expression to take the pressure off and make you sense the pleasure of life.
Create a beautiful life by improving your emotional health. And develop your emotional intelligence. It helps you identify where your strengths are and where you need to work on.
Emotional intelligence gives you a headstart in managing not just your emotions but also an ability to understand and to even influence anothers emotions.
In leadership roles this gives you an edge in managing people and teams
So how can you begin to improve your Emotional Intelligence?
Start by cultivating empathy for life. See things from anothers perspective. It will increase your understanding and help build strong relationships.
Work on your communication skills by practice of listening actively and respectfully. It can positively impact the way you are perceived.
Practice self awareness to become more mindful of how you feel and how your own emotions affect your thoughts and actions.
Acknowledge stress and balance it well by being active by regularly walking or picking a sport, or even dancing.
Think positively about life by inculcating a positive attitude.
At the same time allow your self to seek feedback to understand where you are doing fine and how to improve further.
Emotions are part of being human. Working on your emotional health and developing your emotional intelligence can be a game changing skill in life.
Today I am sharing a thought Provoker. This came as a social media forward. But it was thought worthy and I do have a few questions as well.
Speaking of relationships, have you felt drained out beyond compare?
Instead of feeling energetic after an interaction or a conversation, have you felt like when will it end?
When was the last time you felt a little too empty?
Do you stop giving, if you feel it is an unequal relationship and you feel pulled from all directions or due to habit or situation you continue to give as you do?
If you are a giver by nature, can you actually stop yourself at all?
It’s truly important to acknowledge your emotions and feelings. It helps to know your energy shifts.
A Stringed Existence
There is a lot of inextricable strings of emotions linked to relationships but if you are constantly feeling drained out and exhausted when with certain people, perhaps you need to check if you have over invested yourself. Be it in career as a workaholic or in family where your sense of self is feeling lost.
You have one life & it is your life…
Pause and take a breather and set yourself back on course.
While there are many kinds of people you meet. And it is really OK to be extra helpful, and give the best you can. In fact it energizes abundance to manifest in life… For when you give from a spring well of kindness, nature sets in motion, a share of kindness back to you in its own time.
Yet like many are energy givers, there are many energy takers. Often unknown to themselves they behave in a way that saps anothers energy when they are around you.
Do remember who ever you are with… Giving more or less will not have value. For less is not fulfilling and more is just excess and will never be utilised. But will certainly tilt your balance for sure.
In your actions too, exercise this wisdom and you will find yourself in a good space.
And most of all…
Choose your tribe well. It makes all the difference.
How much of you, do you have in your creative expressions?
What can you do to write from a place of authenticity?
It is well known that creativity flourishes in a flow state. In bringing your unique expression holistically into your writing practice, you can transform yourself by enhancing your focus and connect with your work.
Speaking of writing there are few ways that can truly enhance your writing practice.
Breathwork & meditation
Starting with a few minutes of wholesome breathing and adding meditation brings clarity to your thoughts. And writers if you feel overwhelmed, using the breath to reflect and reset thinking refreshes thoughts.
Setting an intention helps you focus on a specific time, topic and theme.
Spending few minutes before you begin the day, witnessing what’s happening around you, gives you many inspirations, that you may jot down, sense & describe in detail in your writing.
Jotting your thoughts regularly is a valuable practice for any writer. And if it is a Gratitude Journal that records all the things you feel grateful for then you will be attracting abundance into your own life and positively shifting mindsets.
Personally I often just pick up the pen and write, or start to type words as they come, there is often no special or specific space that I must write from. Be it any place, whenever inspiration flows I begin to write.
Yet, I also wholeheartedly promote, creating a writing space, lighting candles, brewing a cup of tea or coffee,playing your favourite soft instrumental music. It’s a mood setting before writing which helps signal the brain for the relaxed writing vibe.
Conscious practice of writing un- distracted for say 20 to 25 minutes with a timer and then breaking for 5 minutes and resuming, creates focused approach to writing.
Every once in a while taking a moment to pause, reflect while reading your writing out loud, helps you to sense how it makes you feel.
When you gradually incorporate these ideas into your writing, you will find yourself enjoying your writing journey and sensing healing & wellness as you write.
WordPress a few days ago congratulates me on my writing journey of almost a decade here. Of which I have been writing and publishing consecutively with all of my heart every day in the last six years and more.
It certainly has been an enjoyable & fulfilling practice so far with some profound learnings and building connections along the way. So I, now wholeheartedly encourage you, to create your writing practice and begin your own journey of self growth & transformation..
I often write to motivate and inspire others to think positively as much as myself. Along the way I ended up mentoring others to express their creativity through their own words. Simply said it has been an enriching experience to share my experiences and motivate another to write as well.
While I know the pen will go on breathing words on paper,I pause to be thankful to all those who have been the silent and steady wind beneath my wings in my writing journey…. 🙏
Movements are energy in action.And movements in a dance can heal and transform lives for the better.
How?The physicality of a series of rhythmic or structured movement like in a dance creates a chemistry of changes to integrate the body mind and soul in a flow gradually towards health and vitality.
Savvy Raj 
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